No Need to Fit-in :
By Miss. NIVETHAA RAVI - INDIA
While I thought I was learning how to live, I have been learning how to die.
- Leonardo Da Vinci
I have always been an ardent thinker and dreamer and I still am. I think and feel about virtually everything, from Quantum Mechanics to Cosmology, from engineering to medicine, from strictly following laws to violating the rules and regulations, from birth to death, from goodness to badness, from happiness to sadness, from exasperation to satisfaction, from gratification to resentment, from things I know to things I don't know, from things I can control to things I can't control and most importantly, from past to future! But, never have I dreamt about having a command over my thoughts. I would be thinking about happiness, then suddenly, out of nowhere, the feeling of regret would creep in into my mind. This will pave the way for exasperation. This will result in resentment and so on and so forth. This authenticates how wobbly my mind is. The repercussion of all these is turmoil. In one such chaos, I was intrigued by the thought. What are the things that my stay on this earth taught me till now? That conceptualization became the foundation on which this article was built.
I am going to list out the soul of the article which I wish you could relate to.
1) Over-thinking is deleterious to mental health :
If over-thinking burned calories, I would be dead.
I used to over-think and over-analyze a situation in every possible dimension. But, as I progressed forward in my life, I understood 95% of my thoughts find its way to trash. As a consequence, I have recovered from this disorder phenomenally. But still, I have a long way to go. I am improving myself every day by crawling an inch at a time.
I wouldn't say not to over think, especially for people like me. At point of time, life puts you in a situation where you have to analyze everything from scratch and in every possible dimension. But, I would suggest that it shouldn't swallow your inner peace. Sometimes, a smile and deep-breath is all you need to walk through a situation that you consider is catastrophic.
2) Stop trying to fit in. (No Need to Fit-in)
Honestly, if you don't fit in then you're probably doing the right thing. (Lights Poxlietner)
Have you ever deliberately forced yourself to fit in a particular set of people just because you experience ephemeral happiness? I wouldn't shrug off this question with a no. I have constrained myself to stay around a particular set of people and that was purely because I was too scared to explore myself outside that enclave and I was ridiculously comfortable within that boundary. As time passed by, I perceived that I was caught in a trap and I lost myself, the true Nivethaa! But, by now I could do nothing for the time I wasted in trying to fit in around those people. What lost is lost forever! I embraced it with a smile and walked away without turning back, ever again!
What I would like to sink in your brain is, it is absolutely ok if you hangout with people you love. But, Never, I repeat Never!, allow those people to catch hold of your individuality. If being surrounded by certain people causes slight disturbance in your natural rythmn, brace the truth and walk away. It is simply not meant for you. No Need to Fit-in
3) Trust your struggles and No Need to Fit-in : You will thank them in the long run!
This is readily comprehensible. When I look at my life, rather at my past, I would like to acknowledge that my struggles are what keep me going. I don't face my life with the applauds that I earned for my successes. The struggles that I traversed till now help me in facing my life head-on. Struggles inculcated within me certain exquisite attributes which even my parents couldn't inculcate in me.
Right now, I have come to the realization that struggles are sweet and that is what makes the life sweetest!
4) Stop complaining and accept your flaws.
One of my cherishing memories in school is when my one of my teachers advised me, rather conditioned me, not to complain about anything in life. The following are the words that were uttered by her "Accept your mistakes and learn not to give excuses. In this process, you will eventually learn to accept yourself the way you are" . Trust me! this still echoes in my ears.
Those golden words enlightened me and it also made me believe that there is nothing wrong in admitting my own mistakes and flaws and that there is nothing wrong in accepting my own self. After all, there is no human on this earth who is perfect in every regard. Life is all about evolving out of mistakes.
She instilled in me not just the bookish knowledge but also certain life lessons which had eventually coalesced into my soul. I will eternally be grateful to her for molding my attitude. No Need to Fit-in
I strongly believe that mistakes are needed as checkpoints to review yourself as you progress towards your destination. It will keep you ablaze amidst your uncertainties.
5) Don't judge. Period! :
"Every single person on the planet has a story. Don't judge people before you truly know them. The truth might surprise you."
The psychology of the people always enraptures my heart. I love to read and understand people's mind. But, Alas! I have failed miserably at it. Never have I succeeded. Even then, My interest in psychology made me research about it. It guided me to the conclusion that people fake their emotions most of the time. Those fake emotions become an aperture for others to judge. Ultimately, people fall prey to others judgments.
I will comprehend the above conjecture with an exemplar. Have you yelled at your maid for coming late? I bet you would have done it at least one. You would have exaggerated the situation and you wouldn't have given space for her to justify her side of the story. Have you ever thought about the reason that made her come late? Well! The answer would be a No. We are living in a highly expeditiously world where even thinking about our own self is considered to be time consuming.
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